January, 2007

  1. Um…wow.

    January 30, 2007 by admin

    Some people are going to Los Angeles.

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  2. Holy crap, guys.

    January 29, 2007 by admin

    Some things:

    1. I had this really amazing dream last night where it started at a week-long Fringe Party/retreat in the rugged outdoors and Phil Wolters and I had to comandeer an oil tanker for some reason and we almost hit a battleship that was just sitting there in the middle of the lake, but it was ok, because we missed it, and then we landed the ship and I went inside this shopping mall and there were all these girls around who were dressed up as hot dogs (no, I am not making this shit up), and there was a spiral staircase in the middle of the room and for some reason I was late and missed the bus.

    2. I shouldn’t eat cheeseball right before bed.

    3. I’m sick, which really blows, and I’m also possibly crazy, because yesterday I felt like crap and should have been in bed, but instead decided that I really, really wanted to bake a cake, so I did, and now I’ve got this gigantic layer cake in my fridge that I have to eat all by myself because nobody wants to eat sick-person-cake that I probably coughed all over and probably infused with viruses. I can see this turning into a repeat of that week last winter when I had no time to cook because everything was due, but I did have a freezer full of leftover cake from the Fringe awards, so I just ate cake for a week and started developing early symptoms of scurvy.

    4. The cake in question is blue, like delicate cornflowers dancing in the breeze on a sunny Estonian morning, because I tend to be a little food-colouring-happy.

    5. I am currently accepting applications from strapping young lads who are interested in taking me out on a date for my (fast-approaching) birthday. You know you want to, cause I’m such a fucking lady.

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  3. Dear Cute Boy that I was Blatantly Staring At on the Bus,

    January 25, 2007 by admin

    Allow me to explain.

    I was very tired this morning. The kind of tired where, when your eyes find something nice to focus on, they decide to stay there. My eyes picked you. Because you were super cute. And reading a book and looking clever. And then, because I was tired, my eyes kind of drifted down and decided to stay focused on your crotchal area.

    But I was not thinking about your crotch. I promise.

    I was thinking about your thighs.

    I was thinking about how boys’ thighs in boxer shorts (flannel) are probably one of the sexiest things in the world. I was thinking about how it’s socially acceptable for men to fetishize women’s thighs. So I’ve decided that I’m now going to fetishize men’s thighs, and, in fact, make them my personal fetish of choice. And, honestly, since making this decision, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about boy-thighs-in-boxers. About how they’re kind of fuzzy and nice. It has also been pointed out to me by various informed persons that other key parts of the boy-in-boxers experience include fuzzy bellies right over top of boxers and hip bones. As a result of these revelations, I am pleased to report that every single boy I have seen all day has had his pants removed in my mind and that, in my head, there are fleets of boys walking around only in shorts. And, I’m not going to lie, it’s been very distracting (but not in a bad way).

    So don’t take it personally, cute boy on bus, you were merely the catalyst for a new and thrilling phenomenon in my life.

    Yours,

    Alexandra

    PS: Call me.

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  4. Oh dear.

    January 21, 2007 by admin

    I am sitting here in the cafe, and I think that the song they just played on the radio here might have been a muzak version of a Dido song, which is pretty alarming because I didn’t know it was possible to make muzak versions of things that are already practically muzak.

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  5. Oh, Fringe Festival

    January 21, 2007 by admin

    Thanks for being super great, Fringe Festival. Thanks also for being over so that I can get some sleep for a change. But thanks mostly for being totally awesome. Especially that Hamlet part, and the Phil being hilarious part.

    Also: Why do I persist in having crushes on totally unsuitable boys? And why don’t they ever make out with me at parties? Alas.

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  6. Rebel girl you are the queen of my world

    January 10, 2007 by admin

    Ok, until about an hour ago, I was so freaking stressed out about everything in the world that all I could do was sit around and listen to sad music, but then I had some tea (you wouldn’t think it, but there are all kinds of innovative things you can do with tea and booze. I’m a fan of Lemon Zinger with extra Zing in the form of lemon vodka; and of tonight’s selection, which was hazelnut vanilla tea with Bailey’s in it), and actually started doing some work instead of moping, and now I am so, so, so excited because my rock and roll school for girls workshop is on Saturday and I think it’s going to be amazing and great.

    I’ve also had a rather useless adventure in gynecology this evening, courtesy of telehealth Ontario, and I think the interesting thing about that whole exercise was the way the nurse kept referring to the doctor I am apparently going to see tomorrow as “him,” which was rather regressive and presumptuous, because the last time I checked we lady-folk are now able to be doctors! Well, baste my steaming puddings!

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  7. And yet again, it is two in the morning and I have been doing Fringe things all night

    January 10, 2007 by admin

    But at least the blog is updated.

    Oh, and, if I offer you a free ticket to a certain theatre festival, it is probably not a good idea to email me and say “I think I should get more free tickets.” That is a guaranteed way to not get more free tickets, and instead get told that you are tactless.

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