DINOSAUR OF THE DAY BEFORE DINOSAUR DAY: Tyrannosaurus Rex!

“It’s true,” said Harrison, a Tyrannosaurus Rex.  “I am just as awesome as they say I am.  Awesomer, actually.

“I think that, for the sake of argument, it might be necessary to enumerate all of the ways in which I am so obviously awesome.  And, by the way, I mean awesome in every possible sense of the word.  So, like, not only am I totally ‘awesome’ meaning, like, really great and groovy and totally the best ever, I am also ‘awesome’ as in awe-inspiring and amazing and fear-evoking.  Especially fear evoking.  Have I evoked fear in you yet? No?  Here, look at all of these giant teeth I’ve got.  Yeah, that’s right.  I told you I was fear evoking.

“So anyhow, yeah.  I’m even awesome than they say I am.  There’s the teeth, right?  And then just the sheer size of my head.  That, combined with the sheer size of my tail makes for a whole lot of sheer size.  6.8 metric tonnes of sheer size.  That is awesome.

“Speaking of my tail, it has forty vertebrae.  That’s a pretty awesome number of vertebrae.  Oh, and have you heard about my eyes?  I have super awesome vision.  My eyes are like a pair of binoculars, but inside my head.  That is awesome.  Really awesome.  I was able to regulate my own body temperature, which makes me awesomer than most dinosaurs.  And I could run, like, 70 kilometres an hour, which is pretty awesomely fast.

“And my teeth can CRUSH BONE.  AWESOME.   I dare anyone to find anything about me that isn’t awesome.

“If you mention my tiny arms I’ll eat your face.”