‘Awesome’ Category

  1. Dear Santa,

    September 28, 2008 by ms. xandra

    Is it too early for this?  No way.  It’s never too early to write to Santa. I’ve actually  been composing a blog post about how really upset the concurrent election campaigns in Canada and the US are making me (so upset that I have been waking up with weird stomach cramps) but I can only spend about two minutes at a time on it because otherwise I go plummeting into despair.  So to distract myself from despair, I have composed the following list entitled “What I want for Christmas, 2008 Edition.”

    1.  A Nigella Lawson cookbook.   Either How to Eat or Nigella Express, but preferably Nigella Express because it has more pictures and we all know that the entire point of cookbooks is FOOD PORN.  (Yesss!  And now I will get a hundred hits to my blog from people googling for pornography featuring naked ladies covered in food.  Hello, creepy weirdos!  Thank you for making the internet a wildly uncomfortable place!)

    2.  A citrus reamer like the one my mom got from the Pampered Chef.  Not only is it perfect for margarita making, it also serves double-duty as a self-defense device because it weighs approximately 57 pounds.

    3.  A pair of really good headphones.

    4.  A solution to my boy problem (problem being:  boys exist and are stupid but I still want to make out with them) that does not involve celibacy.

    5.  A North America presided over by a team of kind, fair, benevolent, intelligent, democratically elected Philosopher Monarch-type people who just happen to agree with and enforce all of my opinions.

    6.  Another new X-Files movie.  One that isn’t TERRIBLE.  I know it is possible.  I just watched Jose Chung’s From Outer Space.  I know it is possible.

    7.  Somebody to go out dancing with.  I miss going dancing with my Sassyladyfriends.

    8.  UNICORN.  (Item 8 could also be combined with Item 7:  A unicorn to go out dancing with.  That would be quite acceptable.)

    I know I can count on you, Santa!  Don’t let me down!

    Yours,

    Xandra A.

    Category Awesome, Books, Culture, Food, Internet, Media, Politics, X-Files | Tags: | 4 Comments

  2. In which everything is awesome and I say fuck a lot

    September 18, 2008 by ms. xandra

    So, this nice lady I volunteer with at the Egyptian tipped me off to Charles Phoenix, who is a sort of local eccentric/author/quasi-celeb who has published some books on mid-century modern culture and kitsch (which, you may have gathered, are things that I heart very much) and who collects people’s old slides at flea markets and thrift stores and estate sales and does slide shows with them wherein he basically, well, makes fun of them but at the same time demonstrates how totally fucking rad they are.  Anyhow, I went to one of his shows tonight and it was SO GOOD.  I can’t even properly express how hilarious it was.  You should go to his website and sign up to get the slide of the week!  It’s not quite as hilarious as when he provides colour commentary in person, but it is still super awesome.  Anyhow.  Charles Phoenix.  I love this man.  He showed up wearing a yellow blazer and a fez.  Fuck yeah.

    And also! The slide show was held at the Petersen Automotive Museum, which is a place that I knew existed but is not a place I would ever have thought to visit (in fact, I think I found out about it and thought “a fucking car museum?  That is one place I will never go,”) but it turns out that the car museum is also fucking awesome.  They have the Micheal Keaton Batmobile, and, more importantly, the Adam West Batcycle.  And there was a special exhibit of vintage camping trailers, which is amazingly fascinating.  And they had Roosevelt’s car, and Eisenhower’s car, and Nikita Kruschev’s car, and a Bugatti owned by the former Prince of Persia, who I always thought was just a videogame character, and a car that looks exactly like the Fluevog car, and just really a lot of beautiful, beautiful vehicles.  And the circular-door Rolls Royce pictured here is, in person, the most fucking impressive and imposing and glorious and terrifying thing I have seen in a long time.  I think it is safe to say that I have changed my mind about cars because, apparently, cars can be art?  Who knew.  So, yes, I am now the kind of girl who would go to the fucking car museum, even though I really know nothing about cars at all.  No, actually, I know one fact about cars:  Never date a man who drives an Audi.  But that isn’t so much fact as it is Life Lesson That Was Learned the Hard Way.

    ANYHOW.  It was really super.  Really.

    Category Awesome, Culture, Los Angeles | Tags: | No Comments

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